The Beautiful Side Of Forgiveness

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There are so many things that we do or don't forgive on either the biggest of scales, or the smallest.

Someone did you wrong and they were really close to your heart, and... they failed you.  Maybe it was your parent, friend, family member, God? 

Or maybe your significant other took the last damn piece of pie (the one you didn't get any of) and he ate like... the whole pie! (Just kidding, or not…PIE STEALER! Lol). 

Or maybe it's something bigger than stealing pie... from them or someone else.

But think about it, we forgive or don't forgive every day! 
Realize, when I say forgive, it doesn’t mean to forget but to let go.
That wrongdoing can be turned into a lesson that can help you, or someone else, in the future. When you don't forgive/let go, it really can start to affect you in many, many negative ways.  If you harbor what happened, it turns into anger, distrust, disappointment and so on. 

Holding on to it is NOT protecting you...
I REPEAT IT IS NOT PROTECTING YOU,
it's HARMING you and your life.  

You start to play tug of war with your emotions toward that person who negatively affected you in some way, (maybe even God) and you push them away... possibly pulling them toward you and then pushing them back at different times.  It’s playing a crazy game with how you’re feeling about them.  

You think, "they’re a good person..." "but they f'ed over me, how could they?!"  You are at war in your mind, trying to justify or blame on both sides.  You think how it happened, if it could happen again, and so on! 

You need to stop here and recognize when and if you have ever felt this way.  Well, let me tell you... by holding onto to all these negative feelings, you could be ruining your true chance at joy. 

As humans, we make mistakes, we screw up, we only think of only ourselves... and we all have done this!  Maybe not exactly the way they did, but you have to remember that you have had your share of screw-ups and the another person probably forgave you. If they didn't, that's something they had to deal with.  You might put excuses in your head, "yeah, but I wouldn’t do what the other person did” or, “what I did wasn't that bad." 

I call that BULLSHIT! 
They are NOT judgment calls for you to make. 

Instead, you should be moving forward and letting the past be the past, whether you’ve stuck around with this same person or not.  Something you did could be something someone else might not do... think about that.

Now, realize I am speaking from a loving place. 
Some call it... tough love… I just call it honest love! 

I want you to think about all the bad thoughts you’ve had about this person, whether they are actually true or you made them up when your mind was running rampant.  Close your eyes and envision your hand writing them all on a white board.  Take all those thoughts, disappointments, failures, and any of your made-up stories and write them down with anger or with pain. 

Then give them a long, hard look. 
Why? Because you are now going to erase them. 

You are going to wipe them away, SLOWLY... wiping them off from one side to another and, as it disappears from the board, it will also disappear from your heart & head.  As it disappears, feel your frustration, anger and disappointment floating away into nothingness.  Feel that heavy load you have carried around being lifted.   Now, you have a new, clean board (or clean slate as they say)!

Forgiving can be one the hardest things you EVER have to do.

Realize it doesn't have to be for them, but it does have to be for YOU! 

Don't live in the past! Take hold of the present!

 

 

Waiting on Perfection

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It’s interesting how our brains work.

We wait for the perfect moment or timing to do the things we want. Things keep being scheduled for “next week” or “next year” … then they never happen. I say this because I do it myself, and it’s a behavior I’m working on to move away from.

It’s soooo healthy to dream and I truly am supportive of that, especially being a HUGE dreamer myself, BUT there is a time when the dreaming takes over the do-ing.

Don’t live inside your dreams… live them out loud!

  • There will never be a perfect moment.

  • There will never be perfect timing.

  • There will probably never be enough extra money 💴 to pay for it… but think “around” those things & make your dreams happen!

When I was dreaming things up, I used to say “one day,” but I really should have been saying, WHICH DAY! For the things that truly speak to you, don’t put them off — start making them happen!

Remember, live your dreams and start making moves to do so!
Don’t live with regret now or later,
just live with the love and confidence you need to do the damn thing!

Saving Humanity

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To save humanity you must first start with yourself.

It can be grim looking at all the things happening in the world or even in your neighborhood close by. We hear things on the news, social media, etc. and it’s SCARY stuff.

And it gets us thinking…
We start pointing in all other directions… they should 👈🏻, those people 👆🏻, that country 👉🏻, that parent, that political party, etc.

But to make a change, we must first look at ourselves.
How can we help spark a change? How do we live our lives? How can we contribute to our beliefs?

We must think twice when pointing outward instead of looking inward.

How?

Start with your everyday life.

Start with your kids.

Contribute to your beliefs.

In our family, we have discussions about different life obstacles, our firm beliefs, becoming better humans, peace, growing, dreams, and so on. Just because I am an adult does not make me superior! Just because I have firm beliefs, does not mean I am not open to someone else’s.

Us, as adults, sometimes forget we are still learning, still striving, still growing in our minds, still finding ourselves. The quote “if you’re not growing, you’re dying” stands firm in my beliefs.

So, as a quest to save humanity…
Remember, a good place to start is to save yourself first and then let that flow outward.✌🏼

Starting Again

I’m starting again. 

Sometimes life seemed to keep happening, which can get me farther & farther to be the person I want to be and/or living the life I want.

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For example, I had lost 30 pounds & kept it off for over 3 years ago, happy with where I was with my mindset, physical/mental health, fitness and had stayed at my healthy lifestyle during that time. 

I ended up gaining all that weight back
(plus, 40 ounces but who’s counting lol 😂) in the last 7 months.

First, I had disgust for myself.  
Then followed self pity,
and ending off with a choice/determination to go to where I was comfortable within myself again & where I felt like me again.

This last part is the hardest part because it is normal to keep cycling between disgust, self pity, acceptance/comfort with where we don’t want to be. I am for myself, as this is what I kept cycling around with for YEARS & even decades prior!

Some of my excuses:

  • I had a child.

  • I didn’t have time.

  • I was busy taking care of all my responsibilities & caring for my family.

When I was making this change in my life, here’s a couple I noticed:

  1. With ALLOWING myself to have a fresh new start within… can be the most empowering experience.

  2. A lifestyle is like starting a new life.

  3. Me re-evaluate all the things I was currently doing, with what you wanted to ACTUALLY be doing.

This reminded me, how much my mindset can make my goals happen OR not happen!
I must start there!

Don’t let your comfort zone hold you back from the life you want to live.

Live & love the life you CHOOSE to live!

Overcoming

Soccer. 

My father died when I was 16 years old.  I was a sophomore in high school.  

He was very sick during my sophomore year of soccer and was only able to go to the games that I was a freshman varsity starter. He was very proud of me, and I enjoyed being able to make him feel that way.  He died right after my sophomore soccer season, but was never able to go to any of my games during that time.   

 I threw myself into working, which I believe helped provide, in a way, for my mom and me (as my dad had done for us for so many years).  After soccer ended during my senior year of high school, for a period of time I had three jobs (going half days to school) to make as much money as I could for college.  

 I was offered a scholarship for playing soccer to a small college in Connecticut, but made the decision to turn it down because there weren’t enough degree choices available to me.  I ended up going to a larger college in Connecticut with a wider variety of degrees.  I decided to play soccer and was accepted on their team, but quickly realized I would have had a very hard time providing for myself with a commitment to the college soccer team. I ended up deciding to quit. 

Basically, I have been working since then, and have become a mother to a daughter, who is now a beautiful soccer player. She has gone to her first try out for the Olympic Development Program (which is right now). People have been watching her from the sidelines, often commenting on her skills, ability, strength and fearlessness.  All I can think of is how proud I am of her, not just for these reasons, but because she has made a choice to become better; to not think she is the best, but to realizing and putting in the work she needs to become the best player she can be.  

My daughter has ADHD and anxiety, which has given us challenges, like having a school principal tell me that my daughter basically didn’t “fit in” his school, and having a teacher tell me she didn’t think my daughter was “that smart.”   I’ve fought for her many times, I will continue to do so, and so will she.  She’s been taught to never be a victim, but a warrior.  There will always be challenges to face, but they can be more difficult or frequent for someone living with a disability.   As a young human, my daughter is aware of those challenges and works every day to overcome them.  

I understand how proud my father was of me, then, because of how proud I am of my daughter, now (although I think I’m even a little more proud of her!! ha-ha.)

No matter what happens, what obstacles she comes across, I want her to keep playing the sport that speaks to her, never stopping like I did, no matter what.  This is one of the things my father’s death taught me, and I think I just figured that out today as I pour these feelings out in this post.  

I will teach her through my mistakes and successes to help her live her best life.

Not focusing on regretting gives me the ability/lessons to grow for myself and teach my child to be her best self.

I will do what I can as a parent, as her best friend and biggest supporter, to keep her following her passion and using her gifts. I will let no one stand in the way of that; no teacher, no principal, no coach.

I will have the right people (if my choice) who can help mold my daughter into the person and player she can be, and the rest of the people... should just provide a learning example to help her keep pushing through the bullshit and overcome!

Life can teach us unfair lessons, but it’s what we do with those lessons that makes them easier to handle and gives that hardship a purpose, so it isn’t for nothing. 

”Everything happens for a reason” - quote said by probably another but always said by my father.   

“Just make that reason count.”. - Sarah Lacko

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Being Better

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Unfortunately,
society focuses on “being better than the other person”
rather than just “being better ourselves.”

As a member of society… we are often competitive, “bitchy,” particular, etc., instead of focusing our energy on being better by……
-Dealing with things in a positive way
-Working on having more patience
-Working on having more compassion
-Lending a helping hand, even if you don’t have to

It is easier for us to look at others and judge them instead of looking at ourselves to see what WE need to fix, grow, or evolve into. 
Focusing on others takes the focus off us. 

When you feel yourself doing this…

  • CATCH YOURSELF & REFLECT

  • ACKNOWLEDGE how were negative/own it

  • THINK how you react next time with your positive self

We can do this in so many areas of our lives, especially those involving our:

-kids
-spouses
-co-workers
-friends

These are areas you really cannot control, so stop freaking out (if you are); it isn’t changing anything EXCEPT YOU.  You change what YOU can… which is YOU!  (In a loving way.)

We don’t want to be kind to others and not be kind to ourselves either. 

This post is sent to you with so much love, positive vibes, and many, many good intentions.

REMEMBER…….

We are all HUMANS, and being “human” means NONE OF US ARE PERFECT! 

Leaning on Others

Whoa…  bring this up to a very independent person and they’re like, “NOPE!”
Guess, what?! If you’re thinking that then this post is for you!

I know this because I’ve been one of them
(and still struggle with being too much of one) 

 I’ve had trouble at different stages in my life, different ages, and I would never really reach out to anyone. 

 “I can handle things myself!”

 I didn’t want to bother anyone or feel the shame I would put on myself for asking.

But, why?
Why would I shame myself for feeling this way? 

It wasn’t anyone else making me feel this way, it was only me and what was in my head about it; about not wanting to be a bother; about not wanting to feel like, somehow, I failed.

Quite honestly, it is still something I can still struggle with.  Just ask my boyfriend when I am trying to do something on my own, when it CLEARLY looks like I could use a hand…
“NOPE!”
”I’m fine.”
”I can do it.”
Or just silence… not saying a thing or shutting out people close to me.

As I have become older and life continues to teach me lessons, I’ve learned that there is definitely a difference between being independent and being TOO independent.  Shoot, maybe we could even call it being a bit stubborn or hard-headed… agree?

My fellow independent ladies… I love you!
I appreciate your strength.
I appreciate your determination.
And, I appreciate when you can take this to a whole other level and ask for help when you need it!

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 Next time, when someone offers us help,
TAKE IT. 

Next time, when we’re struggling,
TALK TO SOMEONE. 

If we need help,
ASK FOR IT.

 

R E M E M B E R, this does not make us weak... if anything, it actually makes us stronger 💪🏻 

Turning Pain Into Growth

Have you ever noticed the cracks and carved paths in the earth from the water flow of rain and melting snow that drained down from the hills?

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Have you noticed that, in those cracks, there is life. Actual, visible life, with trees growing, greener grass and bushes gathering together among the flowers blooming in and around them.

I think of these paths in the earth as being similar to events in our lives.

 There are hardships.

There are stormy times.

There are breaks. 

Difficult times and events that can carve paths of pain, weakness and instability, but from those paths can be such growth.  Such paths can turn pain or hurt into something brighter and more meaningful.

Those weaknesses in the earth allowed something else to grow and, because of the carving in the earth, it provided more water to feed that growth and spread it out farther than before.

Think of the paths that might cause you pain now or in your future.  Then think about how you can turn them into something beautiful.

Create YOUR beauty and find out where that path leads you 🙌🏻

Love Your Life

If you are not in love with your life... it is time to fall in love with it!

When we are always rushing through life, rushing through beautiful moments, focusing on ALL our responsibilities, duties, etc.. How can we love how our life is going? We are always on to the next thing, stressing... never really enjoying what we have at that moment.

So, let's get focused on how to START or continue loving our lives. 

The following steps will help you start refocusing your gaze on appreciating and loving the life you have AND want!


Keep your focus on:

  1. Self-love

  2. Being present

  3. Trust

  4. Do things you love

  5. Learn to say "No"

  6. Go for your goals

When you feel yourself not loving what you're doing or where you are at... STOP what you're doing and rethink these focuses and see where you are lacking.  Take a screenshot of this, keep it in your "heart" pictures so it doesn't get lost, have it has your background. Do what you need to do! Also, know that these do not need to happen in this order. Pick what is best for you or pick all of that at once!

Here it is:
Take your screenshoot, Pin It on Pinterest, whatever you need to do BooBoo!

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Time to break these PUPPIES down (I love puppies! haha)...

  1. SELF-LOVE

If you do not show yourself self-love... HOW IN THE WORLD CAN YOU LOVE YOUR LIFE?

Look in the mirror for 1-10 minutes (YES, I wrote that right), start writing on that mirror in HOT pink lipstick what you LOVE ABOUT YOURSELF!  Why are you AWESOME?  Because I know you are and we need to make sure you understand that too!  The negative B.S. that tries to take over this exercise (it will happen) PUNCH IT IN THE FACE... NOBODY's GOT TIME FOR NEGATIVITY!  There is TOO MUCH of that in the world and you don't need that while your lovin' on why you ARE FREAKIN' AMAZING!

Maybe you have things to work on, but we will get there, just not yet. 
In this moment.... 

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Focus on Love,

Also, look at some of your "flaws" (I do not like the word) and write on that mirror why you like that "flaw" a/k/a your characteristics.  For example, about myself, I am snort and I have a crack in my front tooth that I also like as well!  It makes me, well ME!

2. BE PRESENT

Enjoy the moments as they are happening. You do not have to have everything documented with a picture or by posting something… just be there.

Many times, as beautiful moments are being created, our minds are somewhere else or thinking about the next thing.

Work on saying to your brain… “STOP! Enjoy this moment!” Then, refocus your energy on what you know you should be enjoying that moment.

3. TRUST

Trust yourself. Trust the people you love. And trust that people are trying their best.

Without trust, how can you be positive, either with yourself or with other people?
How can you really enjoy anything if you are worried about everything and mistrust everyone?

Answers: You can’t!

4. DO THINGS YOU LOVE

How can you appreciate or even enjoy anything if you aren't doing the things YOU love?

Many, MANY times we just get ???TAKING??? over one thing.  Some moms answer that they love hanging out with their kids, WHICH I TOTALLY GET, BUT you also need to do things just for you!  Even if it’s little things, I repeat... do things JUST FOR YOU!

To fully love others & enjoy them,
you need to show yourself some attention & love too. 

That could be:

  • Working on goals

  • Getting a massage (WHOOO HOOO!)

  • Taking walks alone or with a loved one

  • Taking a bubble bath

  • Hiking

  • Reading

  • Enjoying some quiet time
    (P.S. these are all things I enjoy doing for myself!)

Having a healthy mindset starts and ends with you! 

Doing things you love re-energize yourself as a person will help you maintain a healthy mindset.

5. LEARN TO SAY "NO"

Can you often a people pleaser? Is your first reaction to say “yes”?

Well, I am sorry friend, but we need to change this. Not being able to say “no” or “no thank you” (for those of you with manners, haha), will help you to not be overwhelmed and to avoid resentment towards others. If you feel like you keep saying yes to things that you do NOT want to say yes to, or feel like your niceness (is that a real word?) is being used against you… Well, start saying “no” when someone asks you something and you find yourself forcing a smile, holding your breath, or having that angel/devil fight going on over your shoulder. Remember, you can always change your mind if you decide later that you actually want to do that something.

Tell them… I am working on saying “no” to things, so thank you so much for being supportive and letting me practice!

6. ACCOMPLISH YOUR GOALS

Here’s a big one!

Realize, that all of these (or some of these) need to happen for you to achieve or keep achieving your goals.

Remember, when you were a kid and you really earned something by working hard for it? That feeling happens when you go for something out of your comfort zone and you accomplish it!

Doing something scary is actually INCREDIBLY good for you! It’s going to remind you that you are still ALIVE and that you, in fact, can accomplish hard shit!

CONCLUSION:

You can read a bunch of stuff, go to classes, get your “ommm”... on, WHICH ARE ALL GREAT 👍🏻 STRATEGIES... BUT, if you do not apply them to your life, do things that make you happy, enjoy the precious moments that you’re given, or slow down your brain & work to keep it in check... 

You will struggle with a balanced, positive and healthy mindset! 
I PROMISE!

Remember, when you feel like you lose sight of this at times (there is no way around this), think of R&R. RESET yourself and REMIND yourself of what life you truly want to live.

WHY GO THROUGH LIFE NOT LOVING YOUR LIFE?

If you are struggling with this, then it is time for changes. Maybe it is a few little changes at a time or ALL of them at once, but as long as you are working towards loving your life, with these focuses, it is going to HELP YOU LOVE YOURSELF & THE PEOPLE AND THINGS THAT INHABIT YOUR LIFE!

Writing & Dreams

Did you ever watch a movie and it completely resides with you as a person?
Like, thinking to yourself, “I am just like that” In a way, my life is different, but I am JUST like that person.

(Weird for the title to be about writing and then I’m talking about movies, right?! LOL)

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Well, I watched the movie, Julie & Julia. This movie didn’t reside with me because of the cooking part, although I do enjoy cooking and eating. It resided with me because of her passion for writing. It was so VERY cool to see another woman (this movie is based on a true story) just going for something AND it really wasn’t for anyone else but her. She wanted to prove to herself she could do the things she loved.

Writing & Life are a TOTAL passion for me.
When I say “Life” I’m speaking of living my best life
full of joy, growth, gratitude, health, and love.

Now, Julie (in the movie) enjoyed writing & cooking so she decided to do a webesit/blog about cooking. Even though she loved doing both writing & cooking it was by NO MEANS EASY for her! Doing the things you love doesn’t mean it is supposed to be easy. If is was too easy, would we really want to do it? Would it makes us feel accomplished?

I think we are meant to challenge ourselves and push ourselves for more.

When I have done this for myself, I noticed that:

  • I felt better about myself

  • I felt myself growing as an individual

  • I fed my spirit

Let me explain a couple reasons why I felt this way:

  • I was a more patient person with my family.
    It’s weird. I can have more patience with a stranger but, when it comes to my family, I can feel myself being less patient at times. When I would do something to push myself, I feel better about myself and it rolls over onto them. They enjoy that! Haha.

  • When showing myself love and feeling my own self-worth, other women would become inspired in a positive direction, too!
    Taking care of yourself and being kind to yourself shows that you CAN make the time. When you give yourself some TLC, the glow comes with loving yourself!

  • Leading by example for my child.
    Not just preaching something I don’t do myself. (I’ve been guilty of this a couple time, hehe)

So, what is something you would like to start doing for yourself (or for someone else, but something that is going to benefit you too)?

SHARE BELOW IN THE COMMENTS:
I would LOVE to hear what you are going for!

Woman's Best Friend

"WOMAN'S  BEST FRIEND"

Humans can really suck sometimes; we really can….

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How can we be so self-centered and so judgmental, having ill-will for others…

while expecting so much from everyone else, but not from ourselves. 

We can change this, if we sincerely care enough to do something about it.

For so many reasons, it should truly matter to each one of us……

 

Beautiful “Lady” (that was her name) was an amazing soul.

 

Lady was the sweetest, most affectionate dog I have ever owned.  She was right there by your side so often, that you sometimes had to shoo her off just to put your shoes on.  She was a beloved member of our family that was recently deemed “Vicious” by the Court because she had been in a dogfight after accidentally being let out by a child who did not close the door all the way. 

Lady ran over to a neighbor’s dog (possibly to greet it) that had been off its leash by its owners, who were watering flowers in their front lawn at the time and were not monitoring their dog. No one knows exactly how this confrontation occurred (including the owners who were watering their plants), but because the other dog had more than one bite wound on its body, Lady was declared “Vicious”  by the Court.  According to their decision, it did not matter where or how the dogfight started, which dog was the aggressor, etc., but only that there was more than one bite on the other owner’s dog.  

How can we expect an animal to have the cognitive ability to know when to fight or not fight back, or to know how many times HUMANS have decided they are “allowed” to bite an animal they feel threatened by, when they are instinctively just trying to protect themselves? 

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A human gets MULTIPLE CHANCES to redeem themselves when dealing with drugs/alcohol abuse issues, etc., but the FIRST TIME this dog gets involved in a questionable confrontation, it can be ordered to become a prisoner in its own home -- not only being locked up (yes, locked up) in a cage with a "secure top,” (the bottom going about a foot deep) and all of this inside an already fenced yard, but also being required to wear a muzzle whenever stepping outside of its own front door.  

Where is this dog's second chance? 

Where is the consideration for rehabilitation or possible community service? 

How can it be decided so damn quickly (or seemingly easily) to throw anything’s usual day-to-day life away, let alone a living, breathing creature’s life, especially when that animal had no related prior record? 

This sweet dog didn't fail anyone. In many ways, we all failed her…

-her first owner failed her

-her second owner failed her

-I failed her

-the Metro Officer failed her

-the Court failed her

-the City Attorney failed her

-her neighbor... failed her

 

Lady didn't do anything wrong (by simply being a “dog”)…

BUT we sadly did, as the "superior" beings.

As a result of now seeing her struggling with these many quality-of-life-changing restrictions, unable to live as a "free" being anymore, it was decided (one of the hardest decisions of my life) to put this beautiful animal down.  Lady could no longer live freely inside OR outside her own family’s home.

Before the vet gave her the painful sedation shot  to put her down, we were warned that dogs would probably bite because of the pain... but our beloved Lady, declared “Vicious" by the Court, simply turned to the vet and licked her face! There wasn't a dry eye in the room, from her family or the staff, who told us this was the hardest "put down" they'd ever done. The one consolation was that Lady was surrounded by her family (as heartbreaking as it was to say goodbye). 

I am a FIRM believer that "everything happens for a reason" and although I can't find one right now, I will eventually come to that reality on my own.  No dog or living being, especially one with no prior record, should be thrown directly into a situation like our Lady was, without taking an animal’s innate nature into more careful consideration — we should think twice before deciding ANY living creature’s life sentence, regardless of what kind of being it is. 

That sweet, affectionate being was a beloved member of our family and
will continue to be in our hearts and memories forever.

 

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Once in a Lifetime Moments

Once in a lifetime moments happen every day.

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When it came to the eclipse, many of us made the most out of the moment.  Preparing by getting solar eclipse glasses, taking the day off work, making plans with loved ones.  But why do we do this only for special events?  Why do we take such great thought into making the most of lifetime moments, when we have lifetime moments every day?

The reason is that the last total eclipse in the U.S. was in the year 1918 and so, clearly, this is not an "everyday" moment.  We could possibly never experience this again in our lifetime... so why not go above and beyond making the most out it?  But we have to HAVE TO think about this in our everyday lives.

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Watching the eclipse was another eye opener for me.  Why did I want so much to make and prepare for this moment with my family?  We hugged and enjoyed talking to each other as we waited for the BIG moment... then actually took that AMAZING moment in.  We marveled at it, breathless, our hearts racing, our jaws to the floor.  The energy was amazing.  The environment was silent, still, we heard slight gasps from others in the park.  Some of them were with family.  Some by themselves.  Some with their pets, children, etc.  All there for one amazing mystical experience.  We all wanted to experience this once-in-a-lifetime chance that wasn't in our control.  We couldn't force it.  We couldn't make it happen.  How utterly BRILLANT and BEAUTIFUL is that?!  Mother Nature making such a connection with us, and creating one for us too.  Showing us, with such a truly genuinely gorgeous statement, a pause, a moment, pure beauty at it's finest. What a gift.  Even though she shows us the beauty every day, boy, did she make us stop in our tracks with this instance!

We need to live with this same intensity in our lives, to enjoy our lives, enjoy our loved ones, take time to enjoy those moments, realize what IS important to us.  I almost want to jump up and dance around right now (but I'll spare you lol)!

SOOO many of us experienced a solar eclipse high.
We were filled with joy, amazement, wonder, appreciation,
WHY WHY WHYYYYYY just let that slip away?!!  The answer is DON'T!!

My daughter that night asked me to lay down with her when she was going to sleep.  We laid there and she started crying.  I was confused why she was upset.  We had a TRULY AMAZING DAY... why would she be sad?

She went on to say that she was sad, that she would never again see that with me (her momma) or with her grandmother.  She would never experience that again with us.  We would be gone, passed on when that miraculous occurrence would happen again.  I told her that I might be there with her again but that she was right... her grandmother would not.

She stated, "I wish we could live forever."
Wish we could live forever...

I explained that many people felt this way but that I didn't.   She was confused by my statement.  Why would I not want to live forever?  Why would I be willing to die one day? Why was I willing to leave her behind (UGH, I'm starting to get choked up!)?  Now, I explained that I loved her very much and I would love to always be with her (yup, here come the tears) but that if we lived forever... how would we truly enjoy things in life?  How could we enjoy the eclipse?  "Oh who cares about the eclipse... I'll see it in again in some year... what does it matter?"  We wouldn't take these INCREDIBLY PRECIOUS MOMENTS for what they are, but instead, we would just put them to the side.  We wouldn't embrace them, hold on to them for dear life and truly reflect on them. 

We only have a short time here on earth.

Some of us have a shorter time than others and that is one of the saddest things, but unfortunately, an uncomfortable fact.  We don't know how long we will be here, but please, please, PLEASE, make the most of it.  I want everything you want for yourself.  We were not meant to be here on earth unhappy, miserable, alone, afraid... we were meant to live each day as if it was our last, love others, enjoy every moment as if it would never have another and just cherish it. 

There is so much magic in every day, every moment, every experience,
every memory.
Let yourself be a part of it, let yourself enjoy it, feel it.
There will be a day you wish you did, if you didn't.

Enjoy the things you have.  Enjoy the people you have.  Enjoy the memories of people you don't have now, but did.

Be childlike, be silly, be free.

LIVE

Messages-
For you and your loved ones who have passed on:

They are with you. You are with them.  They watch you every day.  When you are thinking about them and when you're not.  When you are struggling... look to them.  Talk to them. Let yourself feel them. They show you signs all the time.  Be open to those signs.

Hug them with your soul and let your spirits connect to each other.

For you and your loved ones still here:
Enjoy them, cherish them, hug them, love them, keep them close to your heart even when you're not happy with them.  You will look back one day and realize that those times when you were angry with them, frustrated with them... it won't mean anything later.  Just get through it together and get back to being present and cherishing each other.

Screen Shot 2017-08-23 at 8.37.26 AM.png

For you:
Make all your moments count.  Make these moments happen and let them happen.  Slow time down.  Put life in slow motion (yes, you can do this LOL) by breathing in the moment, watching it, letting it in, and not rushing through it.  Don't block these moments with your busy life and all you have to do... it will be there later, I promise!  Hehe!  And make sure you make time for these moments.

LIVE, BE FREE, CHERISH, LOVE, HUG, HAVE PEACE.
 

I hope you have enjoyed this heartfelt post and that you give yourself a moment to reflect on it.

The Path to Happy

It's true what they say... Happiness IS a choice!

Sarah Lacko Inspirational Life Coach
Life happens... that's a fact.  
It's how you choose to handle it and it can either make you or break you.  We all fall down, but will you get up again?  Will you let the fall break your spirit or build it?

Everyone goes through hard times.  I don't care if you WERE born with that silver spoon in your mouth or not.  You still go through hard times.  As humans, for whatever reason, at points in our lives we look at other people and feel jealousy, not happiness for the other person.  It's vital for you to make an active choice to go against feelings of jealousy, hatred, guilt, envy, less and less... and INSTEAD to feel love, admiration, and compassion for others.  This honestly isn't for anyone else, but YOURSELF. 

Jealousy, hatred, envy, guilt and continued sadness can cast such a dark shadow over your happiness, your potential, your spirit, over who you really are and were meant to be.  That dark shadow is casting over the bright light you have to offer the world.  Now, you are having these feelings because you are unhappy with some or multiple areas in your life.  If you were happy... you wouldn't care.  How can I say this??  Because I was there!  I was unhappy, and jealous of others' lives, relationships, etc. because I WAS UNHAPPY in mine!  This is a defensive mechanism that we use to make ourselves feel better in the lives we're living.  So STOP those negative thoughts towards others, that really have to do with YOU!  You have to stop letting your unhappiness take control and darken you.  You probably think you are hiding it from others but you aren't!  TRUST ME!

Nice try on trying to cover things up, but stop and start using that same energy to FIX IT... to fix YOU!  Don't change who you are, but let that bright light that shines within you show the beautiful person you are. Keeping your true self from others is just a DAMN CRIME! 

sunlight

So, are you ready to move on from the B.S. that pulls you down?  SWEET!  
Okay... well NOW WHAT?!

Here are 3 steps to help you find your path to happy:

  1.  Choose happiness

  2.  Find and grab onto YOUR passion

  3.  Kick self-sabotage and doubt in the pants

Now, you might look at this and go psshhhh... Okay, how in the the H-E-DOUBLE-L am I suppose to do that??  Well, it IS possible... now, STOP DOUBTING SHIT ALREADY!!  This was joking and not joking at the same time!  LOL, winky, smiley, hug, kissy-face, the whole 9 yards! 

Just like when you've given up any bad habit that you did often, it took a while to stop that habit.  Well, bad vibes, bad feelings, etc. IS a BAD HABIT TOO!  And just like any bad habit.. IT MUST BE BROKEN!  Psshhhh.. easy!  Umm... NO, it isn't easy but obtainable and sustainable... YES!

Let's start with the first one and MOST IMPORTANT...

Choose happiness.  You can choose to focus on the bad or you can choose to focus on the good.  You can look at what you don't have or you can look at what you DO have.  You can look at someone who is doing good and acknowledge it, even looking up to them about a particular thing that you'd like more of in your own life and let yourself learn from this person.  We can be so damned stubborn sometimes and our brains are like... "I have to hate on what this person is doing because I wish I had that in my life and I don't!"  "If I let that ordinary person (like me) who is not some goddess or movie star be an example... that means I've failed."  Again... STOP IT!  Do NOT let that brain of yours make your heart feel bad about yourself!  

Damn brains just think TOO much!  Hehe!

Just know that they might be good at this one thing that maybe you might need to work on, and that's OK! I'm sure they need to work on some things that you might have a better handle on than they do.  Team work!  Learning and growing from one another is key and can I say ... B-E-A-U-tiful!!  

Now, I want you to imagine you are with Peter Pan right now (LOVE this story and it's message) and you both have sprinkled some sparkly, shiny, light, gorgeous fairy dust on you, for your heart to soar, fly and feel free with happiness, positive vibes, compassion, admiration... joy!  Do it!  Sprinkle that shiz'nit all over ya!

So, you've chosen happiness... YEAAAH!!  Okay, then... moving onward and upward to find and grab onto YOUR passion!!  What in the WORLD do I mean by this?  What makes you smile, that you do for yourself? What makes you tick?  What in the double-hockey-sticks is YOUR PURPOSE??  Even if you have chosen happiness but don't find your passion, your purpose... you will relapse in your happiness quest.  DON'T DO IT!  If you do what you love in life, you will be empowered, ALIVE, fulfilled,

AND drumroll please..... HAPPIER!

SAY WHAT??!

Ummm, yeah!  If you love what you do and it fills up your purpose and passion gauge, you will, in turn, be happier, your family will be happier BECAUSE, if you are happy, then they will be.  When you're around a happy, smiling person, does it become infectious?  YES, YES it DOES!  Same with bad ju ju.  That shiz'nit is toxic and spreads like a damn disease.

 **Put your protective mask on and exit the infected area, NOW***

Sweet, we are ALMOST THERE!!  Time to kick it up and out with kicking self-sabotage and doubt in the pants.  HEYYY-OOOO!  So, I need you to notice that in order to go for your passion, your purpose, you HAVE TO KICK THE SELF-SABOTAGE AND DOUBT IN THE PANTS.  How in the world are you going to be successful in being happy if you keep yourself from what you love, enjoy, and what gives you pep in your step because of self-sabotage and/or self-doubt??

Examples of self-sabotage... "I have to get in shape to work out"...  WHAT??  For REAL, I have heard this one before, but really think about it.  Aren't you working out TO GET IN SHAPE??  Just sayin'!  You don't have to start by running a 5 billion mile marathon right off the bat, but you do need to start SOMEWHERE and then you can build from that, one step at a time!

Example of self-doubt... "I can't do this.  I want to go for my dreams but they won't happen even if I try, so what is the point?" 

Uhh... NOPE! STOP RIGHT THERE!

These are limiting beliefs that ONLY YOU are creating. If you had to get out of a burning house, would you do it?!  Then WHY, if you are trying to do something beneficial for your life, your health and family... wouldn't you save yourself from unhappiness??  Just like you would run out of that house, why not go for your happiness with that same intensity?  You will survive by not changing a damn thing, yes... but are you just surviving or living the life you want? 

Why survive, when you can thrive??

In order to be successful, you HAVE TO STOP YOUR negative doubts!  Stop those wanna-be negative brain thoughts and tell yourself good things.  I'm about to bring it back right now, BUT remember Thomas the train?  I think I can, I think I can.  Same idea! 

Well, YOU ARE ON THE PATH TO HAPPY!  Welcome aboard! Continue to follow these steps and you will find yourself becoming more and more happy. 

THANKS FOR READING! 
I hope you enjoyed this read and that it helps your path to happy.
Good vibes & much love!

Sometimes, we need some extra help and that's OK!  I am here to help you as your Inspirational Life Coach! I offer a 30-Minute Strategy Session to start working towards the life you want to live and your path to happy, but SPACE IS LIMITED!  So go ahead and click on the link to get your self scheduled, when it works best for YOU! 

 

Surviving to Now Thriving

Making a break through with yourself and realizing why you have been a certain way for so long and just couldn't realize why. Why am I like this? Why do I do this? Why can't I stop?  These are all valid questions to ask yourself. It's hard to figure out why you continue to do the things you hate or dislike, but you seem to always revert back to. 

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